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Tuesday, January 31, 2017

Pain is a good thing..


Change can be hard. Change can be painful. For the longest time, I didn’t want to make any changes in my life. I knew what to expect every day and I was okay with that. The problem was, I wanted big things to happen but I wasn’t willing to put in any work. But, at certain points in my life I knew I had to suck it up. Nothing was going to happen without stepping outside of my comfort zone. I was always going to be a big girl if I didn’t change my eating and start exercising. I was always going to be miserable in my marriage if I didn’t leave. I was always going to wonder what might have been if I didn’t come out and tell her how I felt. None of these things were easy but they were necessary to get to where I wanted in life.
I went into every big life decision knowing pain and chaos was inevitable but it would be worth it.

That’s where a lot of people get stuck. We fear pain. We don’t know how to endure. As bizarre as it sounds, being numb and unhappy is easy. For me, I had created this little wall. I went through the motions and was just existing. I hated myself, I hated my life. I didn’t even know who I was as a person. I had to fight every single day and still do to be where I want to be. Nothing worth anything is ever easy.

Taking the first step to begin running was one of those painful decisions. It hurt. I won’t lie and say "oh it’s amazing" and "every day is a joy" and "I smile every single step". That couldn’t be further from the truth. Every run, even now, is painful. But, the pain always subsides. Mentally and physically it's hard and takes work. I still have to talk myself into getting out the door every single day. Once I am out the door I then tell myself to put one foot in front of the other. Literally, that is what I am thinking every single run. Just keep going. Eventually, the pain subsides, the cobwebs from the night before or that day wipe away and my legs remember what they are meant to do. That’s when the enjoyment comes, I start to feel every muscle in my body and my heart pumps and my senses kick in. That’s the awesome part, that’s the reason I am out there. To get there, you must suffer through the mental mess and the initial aches and pains of starting. After that, you hit the sweet spot.
That’s the reason some people stop running. You expect it to get easy. You expect it to be pleasant. But, it isn’t. That’s not why I do it. A runner runs to feel the pain, to feel the senses to feel the heart, I run to feel. I run to think. I run to do more than just exist.
Nothing good in life is ever easy. Everything takes work. Your missing out if you’re expecting things to come easy. You are going to quit every time you start if you are expecting it to get easy. But, if you stick with it, you will get stronger. Your mind will get stronger, you will develop an ability to endure. You will enjoy the pain because you will know you have made changes in your body. You will crave being sore because you know that’s when your muscles are getting stronger. You will become addicted to progress and change. But, you must put in the work and expect pain to get to where you want to be.
To begin exercise, no matter what you chose, it’s going to hurt at first. Running will hurt. Weight training will hurt. Joining a gym will hurt. Yoga will hurt. Rock climbing will hurt. You must step outside of your comfort zone. You will eventually want to live in that zone once you get there. You can absolutely do it. Don’t fear the pain. Embrace it!
 Beet red thighs from a cold run